A man to go with my wardrobe
Our lifestyle is often reflected by the clothing we’re most comfortable in, which often represents the activities we enjoy. Most of us have a range of clothing from sweats to business attire to formal apparel.
We know how important first impressions are. While successful people would never show up for a job interview inappropriately dressed, I’ve been surprised how many men show up for a first date giving apparently no thought to how they want to be perceived.
When I first started dating, I realized I didn’t have “dateware” — casual clothing in which I felt attractive and current. I had abundant business clothes, very casual duds and some formal attire. Shopping for dateware helped me reinvent how I wanted to represent myself on dates.
Most of my dates wear basic collared shirts and Dockers or jeans. Occasionally a guy will wear a sports jacket. But rarely do they wear clothes that stand out as classy.
So imagine my delight to start dating a man who prides himself on dressing nicely. I call him my “GQ” guy — he’s not pretentious, but wears ironed silk shirts with gabardine slacks to the movies and dinner. Even with jeans, he wears a crisp golf shirt. I enjoy going out with him for many reasons, one of which is that I can wear my nicer garb and not feel I’m overdressed.
I think dressing nicely not only shows respect for yourself, but for the other person. Just as most of us wouldn’t go to church in shorts and a t-shirt out of respect. Not that a guy needs to wear silk shirts for a day at the beach or a hike, but I appreciate it when my date goes to some effort when going out. While a guy’s dress isn’t a deal breaker for me, when he dresses well, it’s icing on the cake.
How do you feel about how your date dresses?
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September 26, 2006 at 8:48 am
I never thought about it that way. In the back of my mind I vaguely knew that many women regarded me as a fashion accessory (which is why I own my own tux), but to have it spelled out this way! On behalf of all men, I thank you for sharing this insight!
September 26, 2006 at 9:25 am
Thanks, Bruce. My insinuation that a man is an accessory is tongue in cheek, but we do use the phrase “arm candy” to imply that we like having someone who looks good with us. This is true for both sexes.
June 25, 2008 at 2:06 am
If after not having seen her for 2 years she says ‘You look different’ and I ask ‘ in what way’, to which she replies ‘You look like you’ve lost weight’, and ‘your hair is longer’ – is that a sign she’s displeased with my appearance?. By the way, she’s chinese but very modernised (so I don’t know if there are cultural issues here) and I was dressed up to the tees (Dark blue reefer double breasted jacket, mid-grey flanel trousers, burgundy brouges and a dark blue silk die with fine white dots).